Wednesday, November 2, 2011

9/03/11 Turning a Blind eye

Today was my cousin Julio’s wedding day, his second.  He and Anna have been living together for a number of years and have two children together, a boy and a girl.  On the way to Buttrio for the ceremony my mom got in some practice in the art of started a heated conversation.  Mom’s a different type of arsonist; she lights the fire of conversation and then stands back to watch things burn.  In other words, she’s a shit disturber and she’ll be the first to admit it.
Mom questioned the need, but not the desire to make today’s union official; what does a piece of paper mean for people who already have a life and a family together?   That got dad going.  He began speaking from high atop Mount Carlo where the proper order in life is to get married, have sex and then wait for the children to arrive.  Co-habitation, premarital sex, divorce… all of these are problems created by a new and morally vacant generation.  My mother smiled from the back seat knowing full well that I wouldn’t be able to keep quiet.  After all, one is certainly entitled to their own opinion, but never their own facts.
I calmly pointed out to my father that two of his own sisters, one older and one younger than him had both been divorced.  That’s two out of six children; practically a family epidemic.  Divorce it seemed had infected dad’s generation as well.  And did dad actually believe that his sister was remaining virtuous with her boyfriend of a couple of years?  A conversation from a couple of days ago would have changed the mind of even the most incredulous person.  Dad recoiled at the very thought.  And what of the old Italian saying “the first baby is always premature”, which is always offered with a wink and a smirk.  That saying didn’t come from nowhere.
Yes, dad’s generation may have turned a blind eye to the obvious “immorality” going on around them; entire towns with their heads in the sand as everyone accused everyone else’s sister of being the town slut to protect their own family’s fragile reputation.  But just because so many were willing to ignore it, it doesn’t mean it wasn’t happening.  As the younger generations take their cues from their elders the stigma of immorality begins to melt away.

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