Antonimina turned out to be a non-event, a bust. We stopped briefly, but mom said we should go. Better to take a picture from afar, the distance would hide the scars… and it did. I took the photo from the top of a pile of construction materials that had been dumped by the side of the road (by no means unique to here, it happens at home all the time).
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| The distance hides the scars |
On our way back mom asked me to slow down, she recognized the house on the left; it might be her cousin Carmela’s house. As we passed my mom said she recognized the woman outside. It was Carmela…maybe. Mom crossed the street and reached through the gate to open it from the inside. I turned to my dad and said “you know she’s going to get herself shot”. Dad gave a slight nod, but he knows that mom is headstrong. I heard my mom shout “’Mela!” in her familiar tone. The woman exited the house, paused ever so briefly and then gave mom a big hug. Turning to dad once again I said “I think we’re at the right place”.
It was pure coincidence that we found Carmela here, she moved out years ago to be closer to her children but comes back every now and then on weekends. Even more of a coincidence was that mom’s other cousin, Carmela’s sister Angela, was also there. Mom described Angela as her childhood partner in crime, a diavola (devil) and a shit disturber; family traits. They got into all kinds of trouble together and although they didn’t mention anything specific I did catch a reference to some of their enemies going home missing handfuls of hair from the tops of their heads.
Angela doesn’t live in Locri anymore. Like many others she moved her family to the North, Bergamo in her case, to find opportunities. Angela lit a cigarette and offered one to my father. Dad, who never took up the habit, declined the offer and mom asked Angela when she had started. The shocking answer: “When I was pregnant with my first son”. The story goes like this. Angela was pregnant and found herself increasingly drawn to the scent of cigarette smoke. An older gentleman who lived nearby was a heavy smoker and Angela would sit close to him whenever she could to take in the scent. The man’s wife became suspicious of young Angela and pulled her aside to ask her about Angela’s sudden and quite obvious interest in her husband. Angela was shocked by the insinuation; “I don’t want anything to do with your husband! I’m pregnant and I have a craving for cigarettes”. “Quick!” the woman said, “get her some cigarettes”. In doing so she cemented the Italian notion that no matter how bad the habit, denying a pregnant woman her cravings could harm the baby more than any vice.
Nicola, Anna’s husband, told a similar story. While pregnant with their second child Anna had a craving for cherries… in January. Nicola pleaded with Anna; how was he supposed to get cherries in January in this small town? But Anna’s cravings were strong and Nicola is a loving husband… he special ordered cherries from a local grocer who had to search high and low for a supplier. Finally the cherries arrived in a case that looked like it held the Ark of the Covenant. The price for this out of season fruit was exorbitant, about 45 dollars a kilogram.
Mom, Carmela and Angela spoke of their families and reminisced about the past. Each of them commented about how little the years had affected the others, especially true in Carmela’s case. Angela said that the women in their family, while never skinny, had their weight in the right places: “una bella panorama” (a beautiful landscape) Angela said while motioning towards her chest. I didn’t need to hear that.
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| L to R - Carmela, mom and Angela |
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